Listening
by time-will-give-us-nothing
Summary: No life flashed in front his eyes; he was just admitted to a pure white world, where spirits dwelled, waiting to be granted ghostly figure and sent back to the magical earth realm. Severus was granted immediate passage into the spirit world, and when he looked around, it was clear there was positively nothing in sight except...no, there was something.


**Listening **

Severus Snape wasn't in that much pain—it could've been much, much worse, couldn't it? Potter—Harry Potter, James's son—had left; gone off with the memories, just like he allowed the famous boy too. That was probably the thing that hurt the most—being weak in front of the man you despised son. But the pain was a dull feeling; looking into the eyes of the boy, he could see the admiration, but most of all, the look of Lily Evans. He didn't deny it—the boy looked like his father, but if there was one thing that made him like his mother, it was his gorgeous green eyes. Lily's green eyes.

No life flashed in front his eyes; he was just admitted to a pure white world, where spirits dwelled, waiting to be granted ghostly figure and sent back to the magical earth realm. Severus was granted immediate passage into the spirit world, and when he looked around, it was clear there was positively _nothing _in sight except.....no, there was something. Just as Snape had feared, every aspect of his life was filming itself around him without so much of a warning, not even a shred of remorse.

Severus didn't enjoy his life that much—he dealt with it. He had a duty, and he carried it out 'till the very end. Pride does not compare to happiness—not in the least. He held no feeling towards the past, not even the cold, bitter resentment that he felt towards marauders. Not even then, was Severus that caring about them; mostly, he ignored them. They weren't worth his time, his life; he had much more important things to do then follow them around. The only reason he did was when he was bored—when he became bored, he became unhealthily curious(almost like a kitten just being introduced to a new house and family) and would go off in search of the highly secretive friends.

But still, it all went down hill when one of the marauders—James Potter—fell in love with Lily Evans. And when Lily excepted, it shattered Severus's heart into pieces. He knew they would always be friends even before James asked her, but still—it was hurtful. It was as if the boy felt nothing for him—like he didn't care. He didn't even _bother _with him. But actually, he did. After he was finally excepted, he wanted to officially push Severus out. He was an obstacle— somehow, the glasses-boy _knew _that Severus was holding secret feelings for his beloved.

So that's when the chaos began—the pranks, the name-calling, the utter humiliation. And Severus hadn't even _done __**anything**_. He didn't ask Lily anything about love or James, or his friends, he didn't ask to go out with her(he never even brought up the subject), he never touched the girl....He was just her friend. Lily had excepted him, his differences and all; she was a true friend that Severus loved in more ways then one, yet kept his secret so she could be happy. Lily was the crutch Severus needed to go on in life.

What made it worse though, is when James became too curious for his own good. Severus had already started under Lord Voldemort's rule, acting as a secret, double agent. When James found out, he made _ultimate hell_. He cursed him out with every chance he got, tried to tackle him and beat him up. His friends didn't help any—mostly joined in the fight. Especially Sirius. But Severus never told them anything, never gave in. And that's what made James so pissed. The boy was so...._weird_. Sitting under a tree reading—who does that? James was angry and confused and led onto a lie.

Finally, they were released from school, and all the pranks and beatings stopped. Severus lived his life, becoming a potions teacher(after failing to become a DADA professor ) and secretly living a double, evil life. He didn't like killing things or people, but it's what he had to do. Lord Voldemort was half-insane(if not whole), and he had to do what the mad-man told him too. The arrival of Harry Potter didn't help much.

But now, that didn't matter. He was dead and life was unfortunately flashing before his very eyes. Suddenly, the scene stopped, but they were one Hogwarts ground. Severus remembered the place like the it was obvious—it was the tree he would always sit and read by when he was younger. It was right near the water front too, and whenever Severus wanted to relax for a second or too, he would look out into the clear surface, watching the sun or moon reflect. Right now, the sun was drawn—but the sky was growing dark, and a few stars speckled the pinkish-purple-yellow splashed sky. The orange sun was setting over the forest, and you cold clearly see the majestic reflection it pasted on the water. Night life was springing alive, and the sound of crickets and swarming and churning bugs was setting the scene.

Severus sighed, stepping onto the plain(apparently, he was floating, just as a ghost would). His body was slowly forming into a solidness, and when he looked into the lake water to see his reflection, he saw a young Severus Snape looking back at him—only the age of seventeen. Severus huffed, dipping his hand into the water before slicking his hair back and tying it into a pony-tail—a habit he had gone into when he was young. Back then, he had long-ish hair that draped all the way to his shoulders and in this type of heat, the humidity made his hair grow frizzy and untamed.

When Severus turned around, he was stunned into a flinch to see James Potter, along with the fellow marauders and Lily. Thankfully, he wasn't part of a ghost reunion and Dumbledore was there too, though it would seriously sever his high-status pride if Dumbledore _ever _saw him flinch in such an obvious way. Severus quickly took up a good-natured composure, rising his chin and glaring daggers at the three boys. He never considered Peter a true Marauders even before he betrayed them, and was (secretly) glad that he wasn't with the ghostly figures. He never wanted to see that bloody bastard ever again—even Severus had a sense of remorse for those who had been betrayed by one of their most trusted best friends.

It was hard to hold his glare to it's full extent while Lily was there—she wasn't smiling the beautiful smile that she used to smile. Luckily, her face wasn't cold either; neither was it pitiful—Lily read him like a book, and she had memorized each page like the back of her hand. She _knew _him. Severus tried his hardest not to look at her, but it almost seemed impossible. He had loved her; always and forever. And...James Potter had....

Looking at the young Potter made memories flash back to him; ones he would rather forget. What made it worse was that Sirius was right beside him, the same determined look on his face. When Severus's eyes flicked over to Remus, we wanted to puke—the boy was smiling that smile that he always smiled. The sad...damned...smile. Unlike Lily, Remus, despite how good of a reader he was when he was younger, he didn't understand Severus's book. Even though he held no _true _hate for Severus back then, and soft smiles were sent over to the slytherin, he would never get the same effect that Lily got.

When there was a sudden movement, Severus's eyes snapped back to Potter, who was gradually walking forward, towards him. His untidy black hair; hazel green eyes....all part of the Gryffindor Head-boy made Severus want to slap him clear in the cheek and turn away. But Lily wouldn't like that would she? It was true, Lily had Severus on a leash. When James stopped in front of Severus, only a foot away, no one made a sound. It was only the crickets and the bugs, and they were just plain irritating now.

Then, James's lips moved. Severus blinked, because he didn't believe what he was seeing: Just as James's lips moved to form words, his eyes glistened in none other then wetness. Tears flecked his eyelashes, but James was able to keep them back—thankfully. "I didn't know...I'm sorry."

Severus's heart surge with pain, but there was no guilt or remorse tied in. It was just pure, white-hot pain that came from no specified source. But he felt his eyes become wet, just like James, and he did something he hadn't done in over many, many years. A warm tear accumilated enough water to roll over his eye lashes and stream down his cheek, dying into his lip and letting him taste a salty substance. Severus shut his eyes tight, not wanting to see anything more. He bit his lower lip to keep it from trembling and turned his head away, ashamed to show this awkward emotion in front of the person who he despised.

No one moved; no one said a word. Complete and utter silence. It was the eery type, one that seemed almost impossible to break. Severus tried hard not to make noise, and gratefully didn't. He stood like that; face turned and lip bit, eyes shut tight and eyebrows pressed hard in a 'v'. His whole body was trembling, and he didn't know why. His stomach was twisting uncomfortably and heart was shaking and thundering inside his left breast.

Finally, when he was able to gain composure over himself, he opened his eyes, and his lips parted. He didn't look back to them—because if he did, he would look at Lily, and she would be crying. He couldn't stand to see her cry. He loved her.

Instead, he peered into the grass, watching it sway in the dusty wind. It was lush green and untamed—hadn't been trimmed in a while. It was pretty. It reminded him of Lily's spectacular eyes....

His lips shook as he spoke, but he managed to get the sentence without any stammer. "Sometimes...sorry isn't good enough. He said it, and he meant what he said. But his heart; it ached. And then, it felt whole. Because...what he said was an utter lie, and what he really mean was that 'I understand'. Summoning up all his pathetic courage, he looked back to the group. James was no longer in front of him, rather back with Sirius and Remus; they were all smiling happily---and talking. Like they would talk when they were younger.

Instead, Lily was in front of him, and she no longer had 'understanding' expression look on her pale, beautiful face. She was grinning from ear to ear in her childish, mischievous way. Severus stared at her, and blinked slowly when she pressed her long hand against his cheek, cupping it in her soft fingers and palm. Severus didn't know what to take from this, but his heart was pounding wildly in his chest. Lily's eyes slowly closed as she leaned in, pushing her lips against Severus's in a soft, neat kiss. It was short lived, and not very passionate, but it meant everything; the whole world, in fact. Severus felt hot, and his stomach burned, shocks electrifying his insides. He didn't reach to wrap his arms around her, nor did she reach to entwine hers around him. Severus's pounding heart began to shift into a low, steady throb as their lips slowly parted. He was left looking into her intelligent and ellegant spring-grass eyes....

Then, he wasn't there anymore; he was in a large room, in a four-by-three picture frame, with the fully bloomed tree behind him, as well as the lake and the sunset. And when he sat down by the tree, a book dwelling in his hands, a smile crept upon his lips.

He felt an awkward emotion bubbling inside him...kind of like...happiness.

**End **

_Review? Please? _

(Author's Note: Ahh....Another Harry Potter story! This time, about Severus instead of Neville. Weird, I just started writing down words...went with it as I went...I don't even like that snape that much...but a _do _get him, and admire him xD. I like using odd characters in my stories, and it's not as if I'm totally hooked on Harry Potter! I do love anime! But still....sorry for mistakes, also. 'Don't feel like going through all this nonsense xD. Thanks for reading...I hope you enjoyed it!)


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